Sarah Interviews Dr. Roxane Gay | I Love You, America on Hulu

Sarah Interviews Dr. Roxane Gay | I Love You, America on Hulu


– My guest tonight is an
acclaimed culture critic and author of the best selling books, Hunger, Difficult Women, and Bad Feminist.
She’s also, pretty much the best thing that ever happened to twitter. Please welcome Dr. Roxane Gay.
(applause) You’re writing is so,
actually let me start, can I start with something else?
– Yeah. – We just found out that
Doug Jones won Alabama (applause) Which is, uh, Very exciting. A little sad for me because
I was Roy Moore’s Jew lawyer. (laughter) – And now he’s gonna fire you. – (laughs) How did, I’m
so happy, what happened, how did that happen?
I’m thrilled. – Oh, black people.
That’s how it happened. (applause) – I need to write a thank
you note to black people. – You do, 20% more black people turned out
for this election than for the presidential election. Black women voted for Doug Jones at 97%.
(applause) You’re welcome. – Yeah, oh, thank you.
– You’re welcome. – You’re not an Alabama voter but…
– No, I’m sure not, I’m sure not. I think it’s awesome,
but I also think it’s horrifying because it was 50 49ish. – Yeah.
– Yeah. Your writing is so,
honest and so brave and so brilliant. And, please go out and
read all of Roxane’s books right now. That’s Roxane with one n. In Hunger you start right
of the bat talking about, your own experience of
surviving rape at 12 years old. At what point did you decide
it’s time to tell this story? – Oh, you know, right before
Bad Feminist came out, my agent and I were talking and I said, you know let’s sell a book
before Bad Feminist comes out in case it flops. So, that I can at least have
a second book in the works. And I thought, “What do
I want to write about?” And the thing I wanted to
write about least was fatness. I just thought, “Oh I really
don’t want to write that book.” And that’s when I knew, oh god****** it, I have to write that book.
Can we curse? – Yeah.
(laughter) You can say f***, p****,
balls, vagina, labia, a*******. – I curse like a f****** sailor. And it’s just sometimes it is what it is. And so, I realized because
I was so scared that this was the book I had to write. And to write about fatness,
I have to write about being gang raped at 12.
And, yeah it wasn’t great. And,
(laughs) it’s been a while. It’s fine I’m 43. I gained a lot of weight in response, because I just thought,
“If I’m bigger, they won’t hurt me again. Because I’ll
be able to defend myself.” Or they won’t be interested in me anymore. And then it kind of got out control. And so I wanted to
write a book about that. – There’s been kind of like, in the past
several months this nationwide breaking of silence about,
rape culture and sexual harassment. And in my opinion,
Hunger was kind of at the forefront of that. And, why do you think this is
a national tipping point at this, right now. – That’s a good question.
I think women have just had enough. Like, enough.
We’ve been dealing with this forever. Our mothers dealt with it.
Our grandmothers dealt with it. And, we see so many mediocre men thriving
because of their mediocrity. Rather than in spite of it.
And, sometimes it’s time to just say enough. These are the things
that have happened to me. And these smug f****** don’t get to sit around
reaping the benefits of my labor. And it’s wonderful to see.
(applause) – You said that nothing will change
in our culture until men change. What would you say to men who say,
“What can I do?” – Oh come on, get it together. When you’re
hanging out with your friends, like, and they make degrading comments about
women. Which is not to say sexual comments. We all talk about sex.
– Oh my god, we talk so much s***. – I mean, all the time.
It’s my favorite thing to do. But, I think you know the difference.
When your buds are like, saying really crass s***.
It’s time to start calling them on it. And when, you hear stories
of men crossing that line, call them on it.
Because men have to fix this. This is not, a story that women can
address by you know, the me too thing.
Which I thought was great. But, we don’t have to tell our stories.
You know our stories. It’s time for men to
just, grow the f*** up and realize that, no you
can’t grab ass at work. It’s just, you have to wait, until five.
(laughter) – We’re living in an
aggressively, s*****, awful times. – We are. – What keeps you hopeful?
Are you hopeful? – (laughs)
No. No. – Sometimes, you know I
relate to you is when you say, “I could’ve done this,
I should’ve done this but I was tired.” – Yeah. – It is, I feel like
we’re being roped-a-doped, by insanity. – We are. I mean, every single day there
are like 100 news stories when there used to be like 10.
And that was manageable. And now it’s just unmanageable. And things that would
normally be on the front page are on the twenty-third page of the paper. Because so much bad
s*** stuff has happened since 5am when the president woke up. And decided to use his
fat fingers on his phone. I don’t use fat as an insult there,
it’s just a fact. And, um, It’s just hard to keep up, and it’s hard to believe
that there’s going to be a way out of this. And so it is hard to feel
hopeful and energized. But, at the same time. Don’t worry, I got this.
You know, I do feel hope. And I do that because, life is long.
And, presidents aren’t. They just can’t last
more than eight years. Thank goodness.
And so, I just think that the
resistance that we’ve seen since Trump was elected and inaugurated
has been really encouraging. I’ve been really surprised
by it quite honestly. Because, I was so stunned by the election
and so disappointed in most of America, that I couldn’t believe
that we could rise above it. But, we have.
– Yeah. – And also, it’s making for a lot of great writing.
– True – (laughs) Which is so shallow, but true. – If you could have one
wish come true, one wish. Would it be world peace,
or Channing Tatum any way you want him? (laughter) – I shouldn’t have to think about this.
– No you shouldn’t. This is the world. – Well, because one is already a possibility
I’ll go with world peace. – Secret project! I know that you’re a good catholic girl,
– I am. and I got you a Christmas present! So, open it up and you have
to guess what it is first. – Okay, who’s on the wrapping?
– It’s my head. – Oh, sorry (laughs).
It looks different. Oh, (laughs). – You know what it is?
– I know what it is! It’s what I want.
It’s a nose mitten. – It’s a nose mitten.
Show the tweet. – Oh my god.
So Roxane tweeted this. And one of the writers on our
show Diona Reasonover saw it. And she’s laid up from knee surgery
and while she’s been recovering, she made you a nose mitten.
– Oh my god. Thank you Diona, wow.
(applause) – Thank you so much, I can’t,
I mean do you want to try it on. You don’t have to try it on.
– I will try it on. – I do love the construction of it. – I love the box, I’m
actually gonna keep the box. (laughter)
The thing is I’m actually gonna wear it. – Dionas gonna die. Okay. Thank you so much Roxane-
– Thank you. Oh my gosh, that is our show. I hope you all have happy holidays
and most importantly a Merry Christmas.

80 thoughts on “Sarah Interviews Dr. Roxane Gay | I Love You, America on Hulu

  1. Thank you, thank you, thank you for speaking out, Dr. Gay! Just think, your story may have flipped the very votes that saved us from any more Moore, which should make our wimpy Republican leaders stop listening to Trump and Trumpists–which will ultimately either stop them from stealing from the poor to give to the rich or else start a sweep of resistance that forces all our leaders (not just progressives) to pay attention to their constituents. You (and all the wonderful comedians like Sarah Silverman) make me feel hopeful again that all the people of color, all the poor and middle class and LGBTQ and sick and disabled and intellectual and atheist and any-theist and all the honest to goodness non-corporate people, all the real human beings aged cradle to grave will finally get attention paid to their issues; not because we can buy these political "leaders'" favor but because we can damn well show up at the polls and pull that lever. If the media will keep giving us honest information instead of just punditry and scuttlebutt so we can make informed decisions, if law enforcement will tackle Russian trolls and bots and Alt-Right alternative facts instead of upping the ante to fight drug wars and clamp down on whistleblowers so we can focus on eliminating real corruption at the top, if our leaders respond to the needs of the people and lead us to true unification instead of just following polls and scuttlebutt–if these dreams come true I can die happy knowing my grandchildren have a chance again. I want them to know what democracy really is, so they can share true equality with all Americans, not just the few who were lucky enough to be born to a randomly bequeathed set if faviored genes.

  2. Yeah!!! to Dr. Gay. Ick to not focusing on her accomplishments and wonderfulness. Why be another scuzzy male silverman?

  3. This is really weird. I was watching youtube vids of the AWESOME game show Whats My Line, from the 50s, and one of the guests made something like a nose mitten. And I was like, "well thats interesting, but I guess it never caught on" and here we have one!

  4. Poor lady she was raped her name is Gay she is gay and nothing hurts worse than being made fun of your name when you are a kid.

  5. Having lived with an addict, I, unfortunately, over what felt like a very long period of time, have come to understand the process of whats required in getting to "rock bottom". It's often worse than one might imagine.
    The moment DJT was elected I felt as if DJT was America's and the worlds"rock bottom". We needed things to get SO bad that there were no options. We must look to each other and lift each other up. Creating a world that is more inclusive, more caring and more loving is far more comfortable and a considerably easier place to be. For too long we have all avoided being kind to each other for fear of a questionable reaction. Speaking to strangers, reprimanding friends inevitably sends us all back to feeling like children afraid of what others will think or concerned we will not continue to remain "cool". Not feeling stupid or looking like an idiot is unfortunately for many a driving force in most of their decisions. No matter the reaction of another, kindness and caring for others should always prevail. Responsible reasonable adults know when they have done the right thing without requiring the motivation to do it.
    Rarely would we ever volunteer "mom was right all along", but without fail "The Golden Rule", "Do Unto Others, As You Would Have Them Do Unto You", or treat others how you would rather be treated ALWAYS contributes to making life considerably easier. Men and women create the world as we know it. Men need to be willing to offer more and take less. Women need men to participate in creating a world we can all be proud of, a world that feels a little less rock bottom and much more on top of the world.

  6. Roxane Gay is an amazing writer and she's published a lot online. Just use your google search.

  7. Preach woman, preach. Fuck I wanna give her a hug for being so straight up open and awesome. And take a moment to appreciate the empathy in Sarah's eyes, as Roxane speaks.

  8. I went through an eating disorder after having been raped. I went the complete opposite direction and lost 15 Kilo (around 33punds) and almost died, but for very similar reasons. Every time a man told me, he wasn't into that, or that I looked better before, I felt great and proud, because I wasn't sexualised anymore. I loved the fact that my boobs and butt disappeared and I looked more and more like a little boy. Of course, now I've grown into my "real" body (by which I mean: my healthy body that can carry me) and it makes me feel powerful. But I still notice a lot of men, who think that every woman that dresses well, does her hair beautifully, or shows some skin, is desperate for their attention (positive or negative). They are so stuck in their narcissistic world-view, that they can't imagine a woman that is absolutely self-fulfilled and that validates herself (or feels validated by her girlfriends). This really needs to change and everybody who still thinks, if you're sexy, you can't be a feminist, 'cause you must be busy people-pleasing, didn't get the memo!

  9. Yay love Roxane! I met Roxane at a book signing in Chicago and understand she's been spotlighted a few times, but thanks Sarah for giving her another platform. I hope we see more Roxane in the media! Love to hear more clear, level headed female voices in the world, woo!

  10. What a great interview!! Dr. Gay's comments were funny and insightful – love hearing her speak as much (if not more!) as reading her books + Sarah did such a great job reacting and interacting with her (she's a wonderful interviewer!!)

  11. I had to watch this 2x. Who'd have thought a nose Mitten could be so disarming? Does genuine joy make the good doctor a bad feminist? If so, I am a bad feminist also. It made me giggle both times.

  12. Did you notice….The fat American Woman, she is already at the chair when introduced by the Jew….., she doesn't come in from off stage when Introduced…. a reason for that….

    E Michael Jones Jones saw Roxanne Gay give a talk in person….it took her Minutes and Minutes to get on stage and to the Mic….. he said it was painful to watch and they all breathed a sigh of relief when she finally got on stage…….. she clocks in at 500 pounds……..TRUE STORY.

  13. United Nations Resolution: Rename the continents with non-native names to native names. Rename North America, South America and Australia to native names. "American, Latino and Hispanic" are Eurocentric colonialistic labels.

    Imagine: British officially named Native French, French named Native British, Chinese named Native Japanese, Palestinians named Native Israelis, Spanish named Native Africans, Koreans named Native Chinese, etc.

  14. She didn't survive. She's just killing herself slowly. A bullet would be less painful. She can say what you people want to hear but look at her.

  15. Hey, Sara, didn't you call a fat man a "big fat piece of shit" in your I love America song? Is that what you secretly think of this lady too?

  16. I didn't appreciate her condescending and sexist put downs of men. Treating other people's bodies with disregard is not the problem of only men.

  17. Why even bother bleeping out the swears on Youtube? Have these fucking cocksuckers never read the cunting comment sections?

  18. Asking men to call each other out and police themselves is like asking your kids to babysit themselves and ground themselves. It’s just not psychologically possible.

  19. Wait so she's taking credit for when black people vote the way she wants,that's sad victim culture has ruined society!

  20. gonna love that. the more feminist leftist bitches try to group guilt men and feminize them, the more men become conservative and say "fuck you bitches" and dont marry.

  21. Who gang raped her? Have they been charged? Sounds like another foul mouthed lefty "doctor" hating men. Woman have never had it so good. Also men have had it pretty shit over the years too. That shirt looks like ite gunna blow. Not fat shaming, just a fact.

  22. How can anyone take seriously any advice from a morbidly obese person? Quite clearly she needs to sort her own mind and body out.

  23. Modern feminism is a self-serving anti-male victim ideology. Please prove me wrong by saving anything that does not conform to this definition?

  24. Just watched Dr. Gay on the Andy Cohen show, I Google her, and Bingo!! I realized that two of her books were in my….. ( Books I will read one day ) draw, needless to say I’m starting with… ‘Difficult Women’ and a glass of Wine or Two!! 😉 …. Love ❤️ Her….. yep!!

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