DICKS: Do you need to be one to be a successful leader?

DICKS: Do you need to be one to be a successful leader?

a poet needs a pen a painter a brush and
a director an army said Orson Welles Apparently he was a total dick. Lately it seems like the dicks have been winning. This is not just because of Donald Trump
or the rising tide of authoritarian leaders around the world but something
I’ve experienced personally you see I’ve always loved making movies whenever I
met someone who worked with a famous director I’d ask what are they like
and nine times out of ten they’d say well he’s kind of a dick and I’d be
disappointed. You can read about James Cameron terrorizing his actors to the
point of mental breakdown on the abyss or about Stanley Kubrick browbeating
Shelley Duvall into hysterics while shooting The Shining Michael Bay’s name
comes up again and again when talking about dick directors
I’d always chalked these stories up to inflated ego and abuse of power
until I directed a movie of my own It had movie stars it had trucks
it had producers it had crafting it had Zac Efron. I approached the movie like
a kid in a candy store. Really bright-eyed enthusiastic accessible and democratic. I made friends with the actors and the crew and I really cared about keeping up a good vibe. It was a trial by fire
and as I quickly gathered empirical data on set I found that people responded to
me more when I was snappy tired or moody Maybe there was something to being a
dick after all. Maybe it was actually the key to those legendary directors success
I came away from the experience both confused and fascinated by the subject
of leadership. This was a whole other discipline and it would take a study of
its own. So that’s what I’m doing I’m going to interview directors writers and
thinkers on the subject of leadership and maybe they can tell me once and for
all whether or not you need to be a dick to be a great leader. In an effort to answer this question of whether or not I have to be a dick to be successful we are going to interview Davis Guggenheim. the Academy award-winning director I’m
kind of in the red here I might be able to pull up a little bit see I don’t want
to be a dick and park in front of someone’s driveway one two this is Davis
one two three four Davis Guggenheim has directed documentaries features and
television shows in 2007 he won the Academy Award for Best Documentary for
An Inconvenient Truth so the basis of this is you having done a movie and
you’re like I just went through the storm and I come out saying Who am I and what is a
great director and can I be that person I like to consider myself a nice guy. Some people may not say that. You seem like a nice guy
guy I seem like a nice guy. Do you think being a nice guy gets in the way of you directing? I do. You know I made this film called Gossip for Warner Brothers and it had pretty good cast. It had Kate Hudson
and James Marsden and Norman Reedus and Josh Jackson and really good cast and I
spent the whole time getting them to like me I think by the end they didn’t
like me I wanted to be their friends and they didn’t want to be my friend they
wanted a director so there’s some of that you know there is something about
wanting a boss and there is something about and I was too young to know it was
my first job and maybe I leaned on that quality of my personality too much. You see the problem with your position about being nice Jones nice people don’t live
life I don’t want to go through all my days
being all sweet and polite and realize when I’m 80 that I’m just some nice dead person. Peter Berg who used to be I was used to be really close friend of mine the first
the night before the first day of shooting I did on a television show he
said show up and within the first two hours fire somebody cause then everyone will be afraid of you you should talk to Peter Berg. You really should. Peter Berg got his start in Hollywood acting in movies like Aspen extreme the great white hype and TV
shows like Chicago Hope then he transitioned into directing big movies
like Hancock action movies like battleship and raw emotional movies like
Friday night lights he did the TV show too and if that wasn’t bad ass enough he just
completed the Mark Wahlberg trilogy with lone survivor deepwater horizon and
Patriots day clearly with all of his success he was doing something right so I contacted him and he invited me up
to Boston where he was shooting Patriot’s Day. Okay so I just got to Boston I’m
taking a taxi from the airport unfortunately I just got word from Peter
Berg’s assistant that Peter would rather not do the interview here but would
rather do it back in LA once he finishes production kind of a bummer because he
told me to come up to Boston this week and now I’m finally flew up I’ve got a
hotel I paid for the flight and everything and now he doesn’t want to meet until
after he’s back in LA so not really much I can do. Is this a dick move? Perhaps.
Since I was already on the East Coast I decided to go down to Chevy Chase
Maryland to learn a little more about what makes guys like Peter Berg so
effective. Hello Dr. Maccoby. Maccoby. You’re Max. I’m Max Joseph. Dr. Michael Maccoby has written extensively on leadership and central to all of his
writing is a type of person called a narcissist. Narcissistic type is a person
who lacks a strong super-ego lacks a strong conscience but has a has instead
an ego ideal you can see it in some of the great leaders like Abraham Lincoln
see it in Barack Obama in his autobiography talks about creating a sense of who he
is narcissists reject the world as it is
and instead have a vision of how it should be and those people are kind of
driven to be leaders because they have a vision they have a sense of what they
want to create how they want to change the world common traits among all
narcissists include an undeniable charisma unshakable conviction not
listening to anyone except for themselves being slightly paranoid over
controlling lacking in empathy and being occasionally cruel the reason they’re
abusive is because they have such a powerful vision
and they’re going to make sure it’s going to be they’re going to realize it
now that can be a terrible vision like Hitler but a lot of people bought into
it because they believed he was going to make Germany great glory he’s going to
create glory even though they were going to be a lot of blood Make Germany Great
Again. Yeah right. I’m going to make our country rich again Donald Trump is an
asshole if you had any doubt. I think it’s essential to his success Aaron James is the world’s leading
expert on assholes. The world can be divided into two kinds of people assholes and
non assholes James imagines a world where there are
cooperative people who play by the rules and do as they’re told
keeping their promises not being too rude and then there’s the asshole
who takes advantage of other people doing their part if the average person
feels special on their birthday the assholes birthday comes every day he
cuts in line interrupts often and drives like well an asshole
the asshole does these things out of an entrenched sense of entitlement they’re
entrenched in it in a sense that it’s very difficult for them to see things
differently meaning this is how they’re wired who is your kind of model of a
great leader who’s not an asshole who do you think of a great leader who is not an asshole… um let me think about this…it was starting to sound like being an asshole was essential for success so I read up
on how to become one when somebody challenges you fight back be brutal be
tough to prove how he would bring soldiers under his firm control Sun Tzu beheaded the Kings two favorite concubines when they failed to command the company
of women to have the ultimate victory you must be ruthless it is easier to cope with a bad conscience than a bad reputation I was getting the message that
I needed to turn myself into a cold-blooded alpha male with killer
instinct so I decided to get another perspective on the matter do you always film the opening part? Yeah.
okay wish I’d known that, but thanks. For the last 16 years Karyn Kusama has directed projects
across all platforms from Indies like the invitation to big studio features
like Jennifer’s Body and Aeon Flux to high profile television shows like the
man in the high castle and billions close the fucking door I think we
cherish this idea of the single-minded ambitious driven I want to say almost socially maladjusted male director like
we love that trope I think the question gets complicated
when you’re female because the idea of not caring that can seem visionary if
you’re male not caring about what other people think if you’re female is
considered sort of disrespectful and sociopathic I do think women require a
completely different kind of toughness it’s a willingness to to really listen I
mean like hear an opposing point of view really listen to it occasionally say
okay I need to just think about this it gets more tricky when you’re working in
situations where you’re not getting what you want and you have to keep saying
okay this isn’t really what I was talking about let me reiterate here is
what I want sometimes you’ve just got to say I’m sorry I completely disagree with
you if we have to keep talking about this maybe this isn’t a relationship
meant to be Karin wasn’t a dick but she was tough so there is a new update in
the Pete Berg saga how should we do it so yesterday I sent him a text message
in the morning I said Pete I swear this is the last time I’m going to reach out
to you regarding this interview truth is that I actually flew up to Boston and
rented a hotel room just to interview you on your suggestion a few months ago
but as I was in the cab leaving the airport I got word from your assistant
saying that you’d rather do it in LA that kind of sucked but I took it in
stride because I really wanted to include you in this would really mean a
lot to me in the piece please say yes praying hands emoji to which Pete
actually texted me back and said hey I don’t know you I have no idea what
you’re doing I’m not doing anything on camera until I know more show me some of your cut call Lauren that’s his assistant It was a frightening text to get
back and it kind of shook me to the core but I did get a response maybe I pushed
too hard maybe I needed to push that hard
maybe he only responds to force I don’t know while I waited to hear back from
Peter’s assistant I decided to go to New York to visit my friend Randy. Alright going up to see Randy. No idea what floor I’m going to. I think it’s four. I was right about the floor. What up Max. This is Randall Poster Randall Poster has worked on over a hundred and thirty movies and TV shows as a music
supervisor but what’s even more impressive is that he’s a longtime
collaborator of some of the biggest names in American cinema Wes Anderson
Richard Linklater Todd Haynes Harmony Korine and Martin Scorsese I figured
Randy must know a thing or two about what it takes to be a great director do
I need to be a dick to be a good director no I don’t think you do I don’t
think you can be so I don’t think you should be I think that an authentic
personality is really what will attract the legions to a director I mean in life
I think it’s important that you are true to who you are and build strength from
that. Here they are the Joseph family. But who was I? people come from all sorts of
backgrounds have all sorts of hurdles that they’ve had to overcome and if you
look at yourself like Jesus you know I’ve you know my life has been pretty
smooth going and you know my parents borderline they love me too
much where everything you’ve done has been like oh my goodness look at that
perfect bowel movement growing up as the child of two overly supportive doting
parents didn’t exactly breed me to be a general you’re not sure who you are or
you’re not coming at people from a true place I don’t know that you can have the
real insight that you need to manage everything because I think the biggest
issue about being a dick when you don’t want to be a dick for being a
compromiser when you don’t want to be a compromiser is having to sort of live
with this idea of self-deception like I’m not being myself I don’t think I stand a
chance of becoming that dick general leader that we’re even talking about I
don’t I have a funny feeling that you can’t be that it’s not your nature I can’t be
that I think I just need to accept the fact that Here I am at 35 years old a
pussy okay so right now I am going to meet my
old friend and kind of Mentor since I was 15
John Hamburg is the comedic genius behind I Love You Man Along Came Polly
and the co-writer of Meet the Parents and Zoolander he’s also not a dick so I
figured I’d ask him about his secret to how he pulls that off the phrase I came
up with on I Love You Man was an open-minded control freak that’s
what I think I feel it’s my job to be the most energetic positive person on
the set even if I don’t feel that way I just feel like people feed off the
directors energy I like to invite everybody into the process but I think
the more people are kind of in the filmmakers brain the better work the more invested they are what John was talking about sounded familiar like
something I read once upon a time in Aesop’s fables
it’s a story of the wind and the sun the wind and the Sun were disputing which was the stronger suddenly they saw a traveler coming down the road
and the son said I see a way to decide our dispute whichever of us can cause
that traveller to take off his cloak shall be regarded as the stronger you begin
so the sun retired behind cloud and the wind began to blow as hard as it could
upon the traveller but the harder he blew the more closely did the traveller rack
his cloak around him and the Sun came out and shone in all of its glory upon the
traveller who soon found it too hot to walk with his cloak on and took it off
of his own volition and if you do care what people think and are open to their
thoughts then something that neither of you might have imagined could come out
of it Wow that’s it that’s the secret but wasn’t this the exact approach that got
me here in the first place sometimes i feel that being too polite gets in my way sometimes it can get in your way yeah you yeah I mean that’s the thing I think that I got better at you
can’t as a director hear every point of view all day long and allow people to
push you this way or that it happens all the time in our business and those
movies suck you can tell they were made by committee
do you have to embrace your inner asshole yes I definitely think you have
to because you you can’t please everyone I mean that was my point about
people-pleasing and why It’s healthy in a certain way in terms of like
listening but you do have to be an asshole you have to make hard choices
and you do have to call someone out if they’re not doing their job so hold on
you can be yourself and you can be the sun but you also have to be a dick
sometimes this was getting confusing how can I remain kind of the person that I
am but be a better leader I’m sorry max I’m not that kind of psychologist I don’t know if I can help you here Adam Grant is a psychologist a writer a TED
speaker and the youngest tenured professor at the Wharton School of
Business when he’s not lecturing or teaching he spends his time advising
companies like Facebook Google Pixar and the US Army in his book give and take
adam scientifically disproves the myth that nice guys finish last in fact what
he found is that being a giver and helping others is what actually
gives you the competitive edge I think you’re doing something that that I watch
leaders do all the time which is you’re confusing being a giver versus a taker
with being agreeable or disagreeable so giving and taking is about your motives
right what are your intentions toward other people do you want to help them
succeed or you’re trying to take them down whereas being agreeable it’s just
about pleasing other people it’s about having harmony getting along being
highly agreeable as a giver is a curse right because you end up becoming like a
pushover right everyone expects you not only to listen to them but to implement
all their ideas and you feel very uncomfortable saying no because you kind
of built this relationship where no matter what right like you’re the person
who’s smiling who’s encouraging is nodding my advice to you would be to be
more of a disagreeable Giver which is about being gruff and tough on the
surface but underneath having other people’s best interests at heart sometimes in the right moment it makes
sense to withhold a little bit give yourself a time to really consider
something where the fact that something is like you know I you know you’re
making everybody work over the weekend or you’ve changed everything where
you’ve rewritten a scene it’s like it fucks people’s lives up but you know
it’s like part of it is like well who cares that ruthlessness doesn’t
necessarily have to manifest itself in being a dick it’s just resolution there
are definitely times where I feel myself because I’m quite congenial in everyday
life where I’m like oh I’m kind of for me kind of being a dick I think there
are certain things that you work against that I’ve learned to work against in my
nature I can’t make everybody happy it’s never going to be your first nature but
it could become your second nature I was starting to find the sweet spot between
being true to my nature also being enough of a dick to be
effective okay today is a really important day Pete Berg
Pete Berg has agreed to meet with me the catch is that I can’t bring a camera
and he just wants to meet me bringing my magic good-luck charm and getaway driver
let’s go okay so a change of plan he just moved the meeting from his office
to his gym shit I’m going to miss my exit okay so I have arrived at his gym let’s go see what Pete has to say. okay
change of plan Pete has left the gym I’m now supposed to meet him at his office
as originally planned that’s him oh my god so I was just at the light and
this Range Rover in front of me was like not pulled up enough and I was just
trying to get in the left lane I kind of honked at it just a little tap honk and
I saw in the rear view mirror rear view window that it was Pete Berg in
the the Range Rover I just honked at him oh my god this is
not gonna work out my heart is pounding Alright gonna put the camera away Wow okay I just came out of meeting him
it lasted about like like five minutes and and he said you know this is a bad
time for me I’m finishing two movies let me think about it which is fair and then
as we were leaving he looked at my shirt and he said your shirt you should change
your shirt to say we are not your friends because that’s the rule number
one of being in charge is to make enemies and he he recommended that I
read a book called the 48 laws of power okay real quick the 48 laws of power
which is actually outlawed in the Utah State Prison system imagines the world
like the classical aristocratic court think like Queen Elizabeth Louie the
fourteenth or Game of Thrones King does not ask he commands a king doesn’t discuss battle plans with stupid girls You are talking to a king! Some of the laws in the book include never put too much trust in friends learn how to use
enemies conceal your intentions court attention at all cost get others to do
the work for you but always take the credit play on people’s need to believe
to create a cult-like preach the need to need for change but never reform pose as a friend
work as a spy play to people’s fantasies act like a king to be treated
like one it’s good to be the king. Crush your enemy totally. but something about law number 12 caught
my eye it says open hearted gestures of honesty and generosity bring down the
guard of even the most suspicious people a timely gift a Trojan horse will serve
the same purpose I was going to make a gift for Pete Berg. You must be Max.Hello Robert. This is Robert Greene author of the 48
laws of power and a really nice guy yeah I mean like people with me with the 48
laws you know if I sneeze they interpret it as a Power Move and I get a little
tired and no to Peter a man who knows the laws of
power better than anyone I can tell you’ve used that before when you’ve signed
books no no I don’t think so okay how about there the gift has been
delivered so now we wait all right he I just got the email from Pete’s assistant
I’m on for an interview at 12:00 p.m. on Monday let’s not get too excited because
you know I’ve gotten the interview with him before and at the last second
something went wrong so let’s I guess let’s not get our hopes up where check two check check check
check so is this just you personally want advice
from me because if it is you don’t have to pretend you are really making
a movie I’m real okay so I’m really making a movie so I’ve interviewed like
some writers who have written on leadership yeah yeah okay that’s a good
good score okay it’s good good subject there’s like howdy what it how did you
become the leader that you are and what advice would you have well I mean I
remember my first movie was very bad things and I was so defiant and
aggressive and vicious when I made that film that people come up to me in the
morning they’d be like you know good morning I’d be like go fuck yourself what does that mean what the fuck does that mean good morning the fuck you talking about
fuck with me you fucking with me we’re just say good morning I think like being too nice is a problem you know you
there’s such a thing as being too nice and I I was I probably aired on the
the other side of it but I was so protective and a lot of that came from
you know fear and insecurity being a first-time director I’m not really
knowing but there was also this sense of like I am NOT going to let anybody fuck
with me right now I’m gonna do this so where have you on your first movie
you were like mr. aggressive yeah demand your space yes what has your journey been to a much much more kind of aquanomos spot I’m very relaxed on set now I’m better understanding that everybody’s scared
you know and everybody wants to feel respected and all those kinds of things
and so you know I’m much more of like a good
coach than an obsessive lunatic director like I used to be and it’s much more fun
it was around now that I realized that Pete Berg was a disagreeable Giver
just like the kind Adam grant described I kind of have a theory that and you
ever play golf yeah have you ever taken golf lessons so
I’ve played golf on and off for a long time and I’ve taken lots of lessons from
different different golf golf swing coaches and I find it amazing every
swing coach you show up they look at your swing and they’re like oh no that’s horrible everything’s wrong and of course you’re doing something you learn from others
they each each swing coach like no that’s wrong that’s wrong that’s wrong
everything but the way you’re dressing the ball the way to holding the club
your weight transfer everything’s wrong and each guy has his own completely
different theory what’s interesting to look at all these different theories at
the moment of contact they’re all pretty much at the exact same spot and i think that might be a little true for directing there’s a lot of different ways to get
at it and approach it but I think most directors are probably some similar
qualities that they all possess probably the first is is you’ve got to be a
visionary you have to have a vision you know that sounds like a cliche my vision
you know it’s not you better have a fucking vision you
know and if you don’t they’re going to eat you alive and people confuse that
with being an asshole you look there’s a million ways to have your vision into
and but but you don’t have to be angry about it you can be quiet and gentle and
like Ron Howard I don’t think ever gotten angry in his life Michael Bay
screams the entire way through they both have an idea of what their visions are
though and they’re very clear about that this idea of plurality or that there are
many roads to the temple reminded me of something dr. Maccoby said you don’t
have to be hard you just have to be consistent the key is consistency to who
you to your approach if you really know what your vision is you they can’t will you go open that door
for a second hey guys can you all shut up thank you
see that’s not I’m not nice love you so you can do it in a way right? one question I’ve kind of asked everyone
is you know there’s this famous quote that I’m starting a movie off with which
is Orson Welles saying a writer needs a pen a painter needs a brush and a
director needs an army is that true for you or is there a more ideal metaphor I
think it’s um more related for me to the idea of an architect and her team you
know an architect designs a house but he or she doesn’t build the roof
necessarily the conductor of an orchestra is an interesting one and I
have actually thought of that before because you have artists whether they’re
in front of our behind the camera they’re doing their own thing and
they’re there because they’re really good at what they’re doing and you want
them all to be in sync I think it’s being a dad being a conductor
being a general but then if it’s all those things without the core of
believing so much in a bigger idea then it’s all empty but it’s all just role
playing right at the core of what you’re doing is meaningful to you and you
express that and everyone’s on board you don’t have to any of those things so do you have to be a dick to be a great leader well the simple answer is no it’s just one
approach of many and apparently it’s not even the most effective
so how do you become a great leader well first you’ve got to accept who you are
maybe you’re the sun maybe you’re the wind you could be a complete asshole or
a total pussy you don’t really have much choice in the matter so best to just
accept your nature and build on it two have a fucking vision something you
believe in so much and are so passionate about that it inspires others to be
passionate about it too hopefully it’s not genocide or white nationalism but
that’s really up to you and three use every trick you got every weapon in your
arsenal to realize that vision this means however you get the best out of
people how you keep them in rhythm knowing what each person needs setting
the tone and keeping pace and last but not least accept the fact that it’s
inevitable that you yes even you are going to have to be a dick sometimes

100 thoughts on “DICKS: Do you need to be one to be a successful leader?

  1. Pussy is stronger than Penis or balls.
    When did being a pussy because a weak thing?

  2. It's scary the way 'The 48 laws of power' is describing the essence of leadership. It sounds like teaching and describing the direct way to be a sociopath. It's scary that book gain so popularity.

  3. I'm coming into this video having watched and thoroughly enjoyed Max's doco about bookstores. This video was entertaining, to the point, and had a watchable and relatable story line. BUT, I'm afraid it didn't hit the mark for me. I think it may be hard to see from behind the camera that this video has a specific desired audience and that audience looks and acts a lot like the director: white, straight, middle-aged, and most definitely, male. Even stating the two sides of the spectrum of a person's personality as being either a "dick" or being a "pussy" shows the unfortunately limited view this piece had in terms of gender. Not to mention the complete disregard of how race affects leadership style. Yes, I know that the majority of successful dictators, directors, authors, and visionaries in our western world are white men but narrowing so closely to that demographic as the archetype of 'powerful leadership' excludes so many ideas of power that stem from diversity. I hate to say it because I think this mini-documentary is brilliantly produced, but It doesn't live up to the potential it very easily could have and because of that will not age well. Please feel free to let me know if you agree or disagree.

  4. I really love your approach to answering questions like this, the ones that don’t have one answer. It feels like many creatives when analyzing these topics leave me feel like there’s something missing but after watching this video I feel like even thought there isn’t a simple answer, there’s a complete one

  5. @8:50 how did the editor not just instantly put up an MS DOS Reboot screen lol…guy really had to think. Nicely done

  6. Here I am at 29 years old, a pussy.

    Wished I hadn't been born a push over, it's hard to get rid of that nature coz I do want to be a leader. What Karyn said about how women should be is so super true. If women acted anything like men in leadership positions, they'd be considered a total cunt-bitch.

  7. This is so empowering. Being a woman it has always bothered me that I may need to be an "asshole" to get where other men can get being nice. With time I have learned that if you really work for it, it does not really matter if you are a male or a female.
    I am not looking forward to being a dick but to lose the fear of being one when needed.

  8. After getting into stoicism I now know that mostly people with big ego's will seek the confirmation of others through media outlets. Therefore a lot of 'successful' people you see on these media will be people with huge ego's. The coöperative people that value others and find themselves not so important will not seek media attention. The image is skewed.

  9. Your style of presenting the content is entertainning and most importantly educating. Thx max and i hope you will make more of those videos

  10. Ive have only ever known your face as the guy who exposes those on the other side of the screen as imposters on the show Catfish. Now seeing your YouTube channel, I see that your journey towards the truth is much more profound. As CaseyNeistant says, I do wish there was more content like you'rs out there. It alines with much of my thoughts as a 21 year old trying to make the most of his time. Some how being everything I want to be, and learning about everything I need to learn to just live in contentment with as many of my decisions as possible. Each mistake not being a mistake but as an opportunity to learn and videos like this are so, different. Thank you for being different and putting yourself out there in your videos. Also frankly, I would say you have more balls than you think considering your smart assery gift to the director. In two words, amazing video.

  11. I think there is a difference between leaders and rulers. Leaders lead and don't have to be assholes but rulers get their way by being assholes. It is complicated when people in authority are called leaders because they get chosen and we have a system that forces the rest to listen to them even if we don't see them as our leader.

  12. When I met Kier Duella, he said Kubrick was one of the most delightful men he’s ever met. So I guess it’s subjective like everything.

  13. Wow. Saw the “make it count” video years ago and didn’t know you direct it.

    This video is awe inspiring to say the least, not just in content but also the storyboarding and use of pauses….wow man one of my favourite channels!

    Also first saw the book video then want to watch more of your stuff. So yea the order worked haha.

  14. You are just awesome! I'm sure we are to see great things to see from you. A great, great director in making.

  15. This is a great documentary and has made me reflect on my type of leadership and organizing for social change. 🔥

  16. I act for the stage and I know that's different from film but my two best shows had very different directors so I think you can always find a way to lead without being a dick. One director was very tough love and she seemed to take pride in making people cry but everyone knew she cared and just wanted to bring out the best in us. The other was a very humorous man who could be slightly stern if needed but he basically loved and encouraged the shit out of us until we gave performances that would sell out the entire run of the show. I find positive reinforcement way more motivating than negative reinforcement … so basically all the shitty retail job managers I've had who were negative dicks can go fuck themselves, I hope they rot in that awful industry for life because they deserve it. NOTHING makes me want to slack off more than an egotistical dickwad. But I would give anything to work with that director again, he just makes you feel like you NEED to make him proud and you'll work your ass off to achieve his high standards, he showed me that I'm capable of so much more than I ever thought I was. The biggest flop I was in had a narcissistic asshole for a director and it was a mess, nobody wanted to be around him and many people got frustrated and rebelled and it all went to shit. We barely got it up on opening day. Balance is key if you feel like you need to be a dick.

  17. Awesome and insightful!
    Disagreeable giver is a brilliant distillation of the thought that I'm going to ponder about for some time now.

  18. I have to disagree about Narcisissm. They destroy people to feel better about themself.. and they love it. People feel sick after beeing with a narcissist for a longer time, it doesnt matter if its a work relationship or a romantic relationship.

  19. A great leader who's not an asshole? Easy. Lisa Nichols. Gary Vaynerchuck. Nelson Mandala. Tom Bilyeu. S. E. Hinton. literally thousands of people. It's the definition of leadership that needs to change. And gender is not just one aspect of this, it's like 95% of it

  20. I am BINGE WATCHING Max Joseph's All fucking Youtube videos and TRUST ME,my neuronal synapses have never felt so satisfied 💘💋💘💋💘💋

  21. 17:45 Adam Grant … Disagreeable Giver is the Answer!
    am here too after the Bookstore vid
    both most excellent ! 🙂

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